Here et al

Somehow we've made it to June. I have no idea where April and May went but I'm not complaining because in about two days I will be back in Colorado for three glorious, action packed weeks with family and friends. I've got two weddings, a couple of birthdays (including my own), out of town family catch up with, new babies to meet, wine and good beer to drink and a whole lot of food to eat (the first stop after the airport is Chipotle). It will be amazing and exhausting and wonderful for sure.

I am obviously excited but as the last few weeks disappeared I have become more and more nervous. Maybe it’s more anxious than nervous but it’s that odd feeling in your stomach and restless nights but I associate with public speaking and major life changes. I have definitely had some of those changes the past eight months and this trip will be the first opportunity to see how these events have changed me as a person. I'm too close to it all here to see clearly but I imagine I'm not the same person that got on the plane in Denver last September. Aside from that, I'm also a bit nervous to be back in "Americaland" with all its noise, traffic, options and luxury. I've spent the last eight months in small cement houses, living out of my suitcase more or less, without electricity, taking bucket baths, using a latrine (it's not all bad!), cooking over carvão and traveling in less than ideal conditions. But that's my life and I love it. I love my little house, my housemate, my students, my friends, my neighbors and even that little town of Dombe 5km up the road. Its home.

But as this trip gets closer and closer I’m back wrestling with those familiar feelings of leaving one home for another. Colorado will always be home for me. My immediate family is there, some of my best friends are there, and my beloved Rocky Mountains are there. But Wilmington quickly became home when I started college. I had family there, new best friends and the Atlantic Ocean that has a permanent hold on my heart. Moving between the two was often hard as I felt torn between two very different places that I loved and where I felt safe. And then what did I do? I threw Maine into the equation as my restless nature kicked back in. This third home lacks that blood family tie but is by no means less important. I got more friends, more amazing experiences and new knowledge that set me off on my current path and to a new home on the other side of the world. A new home that the first three helped prepare me for because I know that at any given moment I have family and friends all over those great states of ours wishing me well, praying for my safety and keeping me in their hearts. And really what else could I ask for?

So back to the main dilemma here: what is it going to be like to go back to Colorado after eight months in Moçambique? Overwhelming? Probably. Hectic? Most definitely. Educational? On a personal level, yea. Worth the long hours traveling? Without a doubt. I get to be present at my brother’s wedding, my dad’s wedding and my best friend’s son’s first birthday. I get to meet both my cousin’s and one of my oldest and dearest friend’s babies. Throw in my 26^th birthday, a play, a concert, a massage (Gracias a Deus), a pedicure, a haircut, lots and lots of hot showers (hm, so that nice tan I’ve been getting is really a deeply imbedded layer of dirt. Who knew?), Chipotle, diet coke, sushi, wine, Target, washer-dryer cleaned clothes . . . oh I could go on and on with the benefits.

So, when does the plane leave again? Cause I wouldn’t miss this for the world!


Here et al - Ryan Montbleau Band