These are the days

20/11/10

Somehow we have completed seven weeks of training. The last several weeks have been routine, almost boring. Then Model School started and the countdown to site placement.  Amazingly I wasn’t terrified before teaching that first lesson. Up until this point, when I started teaching or had a big presentation I called my dad. He was the one who could calm me down, get me focused and remind me that I would do fine, that no one would know if I messed up but me so just go with it. It worked every time too. A quick phone call was all I needed to chill out and get through it. But then here I am in Africa, thousands and thousands of miles away, nine hours ahead, preparing to teach in Portuguese and I can’t call him. The time when I figured I would need that pep talk the most and I was all alone. But you know what, I did okay. I took a moment and thought about what he used to always tell me and proceeded from there. Sure I was a bit nervous when I look out at those kids’ faces and realized I was about to teach them about the levels of organization of ecology in Portuguese but it went well and I felt confident. I taught my second lesson later that week and have my first “dupla” (two classes back to back) in the morning. I imagine my Portuguese can only get better at this point so hopefully I’ll still feel confident when the real deal starts in February.

Speaking of the real deal, we had site placement on Thursday before heading off for our mental health break at the beach.  Claudia, the PST manager had asked for suggestions to make the announcement more fun than just opening our envelopes all together and those of us in Education thought it would be cool if there was a giant map of Moçambique and we were all blindfolded and silently led to our site. We would still have our envelopes with site details but when you removed your blindfold you’d be standing at/near your site and could immediately see who was nearby. It’s a shocking experience anyway so why not make it more fun and have immediate locations results.  Unfortunately the Heath folks complained that they didn’t want the shock factor (for them the site placement is more about the organization they’ll work for and not location within the country) and we got overruled. Instead we opened our envelopes together and then walked to our province on the giant map. It was still entertaining and exciting and tense but the blindfolds would have been fun! But back to the point. As I read the letter on the outside of the envelope I realized my packet seemed rather light as compared to others which only increased my anxiety. I wish I could really describe what it felt like to open the envelope and pull out that sheet and read my name.  There was electricity in the air as everyone digested what they saw and walked to their province, looking around to see where their friends were going and who was moving in the same direction as them. After so many months of unknowns, we finally knew where we’d be living and working for the next two years. And without further adieu, although I did already post it on facebook, I am headed to Manica Province and the Escola Secundária de Dombe. It’s a brand new site so information is limited. What I do know is that it’s a mission school nearish the Zimbabwe border, in/close to the mountains, cooler in temperature and supposedly very beautiful.  From the Lonely Planet Moçambique book I can say that’s its near several national reserves, the tallest mountain in Moz and has a lot of opportunities for hiking. The biodiversity is supposedly amazing and I should have access to a variety of food.  I have a roommate, Mona, who is wonderful and they are actually building our house as we speak (cross your fingers for it to be actually done when we get there in two weeks). We will live on the campus of the school but it’s hard to know what that means exactly. I think it’s safe to assume electricity but maybe even running water. And even though we will be living at the school, the actual village isn’t far but again I don’t know the amenities available. Hopefully some access to internet and maybe a restaurant. Okay so I guess when I said that I was finally happy to have something concrete to work with I was getting a little ahead of myself. But I know my site and that’s really all I need right now. I am excited for the surprises still ahead and am really happy I have someone to face them with.

These Are The Days – Van Morrison

Anticipation

We just finished week 5 of training and things are becoming routine. That initial excitement and thrill has worn off as we have each settled into our daily schedule and grown accustom to the ways of our families. I feel very much at home here in Namaacha and enjoy being around all the other volunteers. On the other hand, I’m ready to get out to site, to see new things and start cooking for myself. Little things are starting to frustrate and annoy me. I’m not use to explaining my every move to people or having my silences analyzed. My mom has decided that when I’m quiet I’m thinking about the boyfriend I left behind in the States. Based on some pictures I’ve shown she’s convinced she knows who it is but assures me that I will meet a nice Moçambiquen man and forget all about this lost love. Sometimes I just don’t feel like talking and anyone who’s spent time with me knows I’m always like that. Not being able to say whatever’s on my mind is tough though and sometimes rather than explaining it in a roundabout way, I stay quiet. The last several days between the heat, wind and thunderstorms we’ve lost power quite a bit and that’s led to some good discussions with my family. Last night I explained that I’d be teaching 10^th grade (decima classe) for model school and then had a Portuguese-English vocabulary session with everyone around the table. I enjoy those evenings but typically everyone is watching their telanovela until we eat around 8:30 or 9 and then I go to bed. Doesn’t leave a whole lot of time for deep discussions.

But things are starting to change. We took our mid-way language proficiency exam (LPIs) last week and language groups are shifting a bit as we head into more technical training. The first five weeks were more language intensive and now those classes will taper off as we prep for site. For those of us in education, the next week will be mostly lesson planning for model school where we will each teach four full length classes in Portuguese to local kids. It’s good for us to practice in a “safe” setting where we can get feedback and ask questions. I’m already nervous. Right in the middle of model school is our mental health break and most of us are headed out to the beach at Xia-Xia. Some current PCVs have set everything up for us and I think everyone is ready to see a new part of the country. We find out our site placements the night before we leave so it should give us a chance to debrief/vent/party/mope away from PC staff and our families. It’s a bit crazy because after Xia-Xia it’s the second week of model school (with an afternoon free for Thanksgiving!) and a week with our homestay celebration, final LPIs, World Aids Day, closing sessions, swearing in and shipping off.  A couple of whirlwind weeks to finish off PST.

Beautiful World

Happy Halloween!

I think Halloween fell at an appropriate time for us here in Moz. We’ve reached the one month in country mark and are about halfway through training. Luckily some arrangements were made so we could have a Halloween party at Casa Grande. We needed it too. There has been some tension in the air lately as we approach our first big language proficiency exams and cliques are becoming more defined. A diversity session yesterday afternoon got some tempers flared and feelings hurt. Looking back at diversity training in the college setting I remember similar outcomes but this is a group of 71 very different, very strong, very forward people so it’s exaggerated a bit. We’ll all get through it and be fine but it’s a delicate situation at the moment.

Anyway, back to the party! As every child in the States knows, Halloween is a time for costumes, creativity, pranks and candy. That concept is quite foreign here. I tried to explain it to my sister as we walked to the market the other night but the idea of children dressing up as characters, animals and scary things so they can run around and ask strangers for candy was lost on her. I think I described it quite well but I wish I’d had a camera to capture the look on her face.  Last weekend a group of us went into Matola for some pizza, shopping and a break from Namaacha. As we walked through the gloriousness that is Shop-Rite, we tried to figure out costumes using what little Moz has to offer in that department. By chance, Meagan and I found these glow stick mouse ears and thus Minnie and Mickey Mouse were created. Our glowing ears were a hit and made it easy for us to find each other all night! I was super impressed with the creativity in the group. We had a loofah, a couple chapa drivers complete with cardboard cars, some Fanta girls, hula dancers, the Cat in the Hat, Thing 1 and Thing 2 and a whole language group came as a cow with a butcher leading it to slaughter. It was amazing. We danced and talked and reconnected and then went out afterwards to continue the night. For the first time since I got here I was not in bed before 10pm. I actually ended up crawling in through my window at around 11:30 as a miscommunication left my family thinking I was staying somewhere else and me coming home to a locked door. I’m such a rebel!

But I woke up this morning after another vivid, malaria prophylaxis induced dream and was slightly overwhelmed by emotion.  At first my dreams were always about being in the U.S., with friends and family, back in Wilmington as an RA. They have slowly transitioned into U.S. settings with Peace Corps people and finally very clear Moz situations complete with Portuguese. But last night’s was a combination of it all. I remember traveling with my family around what was supposed to be my site here in Moçambique; there were other volunteers and definitely some Portuguese being used. And I mean my entire family was there: mom and Marv, dad and Mary, Jesse and his lovely crew, my cousin Rhonda, my uncle Steve and even my Granny was there at one point. The exact details have already started to fade but I clearly remember hearing Rhonda on the phone telling someone that she was at my PC site and that she had lost a shoe to the mud. I wake up from dreams like that with a heavy heart; missing my family, wishing I could just get up and easily communicate all my thoughts with the people around me.  There haven’t been as many of those mornings lately, but I imagine there are more to come.

As this one month mark approached I have had a lot of “holy crap I’m in Africa moments”. Sometimes they happen as I walk down the road to the market or sit and study outside in the yard. Moments when I’m reminded of the beauty and friendliness of this country. Sometimes they’re a little more harsh. Like on our return trip from Matola when we were temporarily stuck in Boane as the sun began to set and there weren’t any chapas to Namaacha in sight. Or when we finally found one and shared it with a record breaking 24 people. The most memorable moment thus far is when a masked, hissing man jumped out of the shadows on my road and scared the shit out of me. Don’t worry, I had a friend walking me home, he remained calm and the guy didn’t do anything but slink back into the darkness. The results may have been different had I been alone, although I think he just wanted to scare passerbys, but there was a moment of fear and uneasiness as I realized I couldn’t call 911 or even reason with the guy had he wanted to rob me. Don’t get me wrong though, I feel very safe hear and think that as long as I’m making green-light decisions (thanks Larry Wray) I won’t have any serious incidents. There are just those times when you realize you are completely out of your element and at the mercy of Moçambique.

So we are about two weeks away from learning our placements and four weeks away from being sworn in as real Peace Corps Volunteers. Our tech sessions are starting to focus on lesson planning and we’ll be having model school in a couple weeks. By December 6^th or 7^th I’ll be at site and come February I’ll be teaching my own classes in Portuguese. I think we are all ready to cook for ourselves, to not have a family watching our every move but at the same time it’s safe and comfortable here. There are 70 other Americans within a 30min walk of me and I know I could call or find anyone of them if I needed anything.  In a month I may have one site/roommate and be a several hour chapa ride away from the next closest PCV. It’s a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. And for someone who enjoys emotional stability it’s a challenge. But as the PC posters say: it’s the hardest thing you’ll ever love.

Beautiful World – Dierks Bentley and Patty Griffin

Marching on...

10/15/10

Okay let’s be frank. Moçambique is a beautiful country with unbelievably friendly people and some damn good bread but it’s also a completely different way of life.  In our sheltered world in the states it’s hard to believe that this is how a majority of the world always lives, never knowing anything else. My two weeks (sometimes it seems like a lot longer)here in Namaacha have opened my eyes to more new things than I can explain.

I’ll start with the fact that I’m in place where very little English is spoken and the only real way to communicate with the people I live with is through butchered Portuguese and hand gestures.  And while my language skills are improving, most conversations revolve around how we are feeling, the day’s activities, the weather and those words I can quickly look up in my dictionary. We’re not solving the world’s problems here but we’re communicating. I understand when my mom tells me I don’t eat enough (um when you eat five good meals of carbs and starch a day it’s hard for any given one to be very big), when my sister tells me which water to use to tomar banho (take a bath) and when my uncle continually explains the geography of Moz and southern Africa to me. And I was well aware that I got scolded this morning for leaving my boiled water in the teapot to cool overnight and for not refilling it to warm water for morning cha (tea). I was actually really happy about that one because I really felt like one of the kids and not the poor little American girl who doesn’t know a rinse basin from a pot of shima.

I’ve also experienced some interesting new things here in Moz.  Last weekend my mom was in Maputo visiting a family friend who was in the hospital, so it was pretty much just me, my sisters and my nieces and nephews in the house.  On Sunday I learned how to wash clothes and really clean my room and that night my sisters asked if I knew how to cook. I smiled and explain that of course I did - if it meant boiling water and adding the contents of a box to said water.  I pointed to a package of massa (pasta) and said “oh, I can make that”. My sister looked back and said “okay, show me”. I proceeded to make my massa to my standards (which means an eighth of the oil) and learn how to sauté chicken feet with onions and tomatoes.  I didn’t actually eat the chicken feet but I can’t knock the flavor they added to the meal. I was proud of myself until one sister laughed and said I had a lot to learn. Okay fine, burst my nice little bubble with your terribly true dose of reality. My confidence is fine.

Probably the most eye opening and uncomfortable experience was my first trip in a true Moçambiquen chapa (taxi like van).  Last Saturday we all went into Maputo with our language groups to do some shopping and practice our Portuguese.  We left Namaacha at 6:30am in PC only chapas. Now a chapa is like a really well worn 15 passenger van that will take you and 20 of what you better hope are your nearest and dearest, very clean friends from point A to point B. Safe to say it was tight in those chapas as we headed into Maputo but it was other PCTs (Peace Corps Trainees) and our language teachers so everyone was cool.  Seven hours later the situation wasn’t quite as neat and tidy.  Groups were spread out throughout Maputo and surrounding areas to shop because the place they normal go is officially off limits since it was discovered that the owner sells drugs to fund terrorist groups.  Now that order comes straight from Obama so there’s no arguing. Anyway, our group stayed with another group to do our shopping and after hours of walking all over Baixo (downtown Maputo) we headed towards the chapa terminal to catch a ride back out to Namaacha. This time it was our group of 10, 8 other adults, a baby and everyone’s shopping bags. It was hot, there was traffic leaving town and 1.5 hours turned to 2 as our chapa struggled up the hills to Namaacha.  One thing to mention is that Moçambiquens don’t use deodorant and have a very distinct odor to them. They are actually very clean people but being crammed into a chapa with a bunch of them can do number on your nostrils. Luckily we had all just bought our phones so we had some good distractions.  I learned that I feel quite strongly about my personal bubble, it’s important to open your window if possible despite the glares from the person practically sitting in your lap and I will be in incredible shape after two years because I plan on riding my bike whenever possible.

Wide open spaces...

10/8/10

I have this tradition with a friend where we write e-mails when we can about whatever is going on in our lives and somehow we got to using song titles as subject lines.  For me it was a song that described my life at the time or I was particularly enjoying. I’ve been slacking on my end of that exchange but it got me thinking about music and how important it is in our lives. Even here in Mocambique music is everywhere and usually being played really really loud. So as I have transitioned into this new life, I’ve been relying on music to calm my nerves and comfort my heart.

I’d be lying if I said everything was perfect and I’m loving every minute. It’s been hard. Really hard sometimes.  There was jetlag at first, the adjustment to new foods and dealing with the subsequent “system issues”, then came latrines, bucket baths and the language barrier between me and basically everyone else. It’s difficult and stressful and sometimes I just want to throw in the towel and return to my easy suburban life. The first night in Namaacha with my host family was my worst and I’ll admit there were some tears and some “what the hell am I doing”’s and I’m fairly certain I’ll probably have other nights like that. But then there are those truly wonderful moments of connection and beauty and joy.  Showing my host family the dance I learned in class that day and having them laugh at my “dance skills”, juggling a soccer ball with my brother, understanding an entire conversation in Portuguese, hearing rain on the tin roof of my little house. I’ve only been in this country a week and a half but the soundtrack of my life might rival that of any hit film.

So, back on topic. For anyone who knows me, ‘Wide Open Spaces’ is basically the story of my life and you can’t really get any more wide open spaces than in Africa.  The landscape is beautiful and natural and seriously straight out of The Lion King. I half expect to see Pride Rock off in the distance one of these days. Namaacha, my current home, is on the frontera (very close to the Swaziland border) about an hour and a half outside Maputo. Basically as far south as you can be in Mocambique without hanging out with the border patrol.  I think I heard that there about 40,000 people in the district but most are quite spread out and not directly in town.  Its remote and rustic and like nothing I’ve ever experienced. True open spaces.

I’ve found over the years that certain songs will forever take me back to particular moments in time. Jeff Buckley’s ‘Hallelujah’ drops me back into the emotional turmoil that was the end of my freshman year of college. Anything Ryan Montbleau reminds of my adventures at the Don Lee Center and Kenny Chesney’s ‘Better as a Memory’ reassures me that some people, things and places are simply meant to be items of the past. I fall asleep to the soothing sounds of Jack Johnson, Bruce Hornsby and Michael Brooks. I remind myself that I have the most amazing support system back home with the mix my mom made me (and that amazing book of letters!) and pump myself up with some Justin Timberlake and G. Love.

I guess what I’m saying is that I’m surviving. Some days are harder than others but overall things are good. I’m learning Portuguese little by little, making friends with some truly amazing and motivated people and loving the immediate acceptance I received from my host family.  I will describe them more another time but they are wonderful. It’s a huge family and I don’t exactly know how everyone fits in but everyone is accepted and welcomed. They are patient with me, laugh at my American ways and give me the space I need without isolating me from daily activities. I’m getting used to and enjoying bucket baths and am mastering my skills at Charades when words aren’t available. This weekend my mom is teaching me to cook. Obviously she’s a patient women!

Boa Tarde!

I have been in Mozambique for about a day now and am completely in love and completely overwhelmed (in a good way). Staging in Philadelphia went really well and I met a bunch of wonderful people but it didn't do all that much to prepare us for actually being in country.  The 15 hour flight wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but then I was able to sleep for 11 or 12 hours of it. And if you haven't seen WALL-E yet, its wonderful. I bonded with that little robot somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean. My group (the second half of the alphabet) had a long layover in Johannesburg before our connection into Maputo and got lots of stares as we sprawled ourselves out surrounded by piles of backpacks and dufflebags.  We probably looked a little rough and ragged after our time in flight so I can't blame them.  The best news is that everyone's luggage made it with nothing damaged or lost. My half of the alphabet is staying at a hotel in the center of Maputo and we come over to the other half's hotel for training sessions.

Today we've gone over safety and security, water filtration and medical kits, gotten vaccines, met the ambassador and had our introductory language assessments.  There's a lot of information to absorb and my jetlagged mind is a bit stressed.  Overall though its been amazing. The food is great and the PC/Moz staff is forever helpful. We head out to our homestay in Namaacha on Saturday and will be there until December.  The training schedule looks intense between technical and language sessions but I can't wait to get started.

I don't know how internet access will be in Namaacha but I'll try to get on again soon to give more details and maybe add some pictures.

Miss you all!

My pre-trip to-do list

I’ve been making this mental list for a while and with my departure less than two weeks away I’ve been feeling pressured to get everything ready while still enjoying the people and places here. So in no particular order:

-Spend time with and say good-bye to everyone out East (that was a tough and very emotional task)



some of the VA family





It's an old picture, but we're together!



Don Lee Center Staff Spring '10



Getting excited for Harry Potter World



-Get all my belongings from 7 years on the east coast back to Colorado (roadtrip!)

-Spoil Tommy rotten! (I love that kid)

-Serious family time (an ongoing process)

-Pack for two years in Africa (Ha! Pretty sure I’ll be working on that one until I leave for the airport)

-Attend a couple of Broncos games (two down and one regular season game to go!)

-Apply for my special passport and visa (applications are practical and logical so I’m good there)

-Spend as much time as possible with my nieces and nephew (finally saw some soccer games)



Ashlee & Jesse in back with Luke, Emmah & Amelia (l-r)



-Learn a bit of Portuguese (Fale mais devagar. A phrase I need to get down now.)

-Consolidate the stuff I’m leaving behind to help my mom out during any future moves (Eh, it will come)

-Get up to the mountains a couple of times (Vail, Steamboat Springs, Rocky Mt. National Park, Estes Park)



A view from the top of Vail Mt.



-Eat at Chipotle at least once a week and drown myself in diet coke (finally an easy one)

-Make a little money (Or should I say “get a job I enjoy and meet some great new people”. Darn you Regis Bookstore!)

 -Mentally and emotionally prepare for some intense culture shock (I’m not even going to touch that one)



So I think I’m doing pretty good with my preparations.  My mom and I have done a lot of shopping this past week and are making a solid dent in the extensive list the PC Mozambique desk sent out.  I’m fairly certain the majority of my 80lbs of luggage will be toiletries and practical stuff rather than clothes. I’m bring like 10 pairs of shoes (which is really not me) but I’ve got all my bases covered plus some “comfort” shoes. Packing should be a fun process.

Side Note -  I’ve been asked a couple times what little things I need for this adventure, so much to my dismay I am including a list of such items: single serving drink mixes (crystal light, kool-aid, nestea, etc), AAA batteries, US postage stamps, dry spices or herb seeds, pictures of the familiar people/places/things I love.