I had mixed emotions going into my vacation. I was ready for
a break and was looking forward to focusing on myself and my own needs after
the long days of travel and the transition to India. The recently diagnosed
tendonitis in my shoulder was preventing me from most physical activity,
including my tried and true stress relievers of running and yoga. My mind was
cluttered and my body tired. But I was also sad to leave the group in Palampur,
worried I would miss an important moment or significant breakthrough for the
students. I had been with these 19 individuals for over two months now and had
not gone a day without being in their presence. Our TBB selected family had
grown close and more often than not my days revolved around the students, their
needs and the program. Ten days was a
long time to be away and I found comfort in each hug and the well wishes from
the group. I had this feeling of uncertainty and sadness as my tuktuk drove
away from the IDEX house.
I have never enjoyed
crowded, chaotic transport terminals regardless of the country. As the
sun set and the platform got dark, I wandered between parked buses inquiring if
I had found the right vehicle. I would
show my faded ticket and ask “Delhi?” hoping someone would take pity and guide
me to my seat. I eventually found an English
speaking, fellow searcher and together we determined that our bus had not yet
arrived but when it did it would not pull into a slip but rather idle in front.
So just before 7pm, I ran to what I could only hope was the correct bus, found
my seat and settled in for the 12 hour trip south to New Delhi. As the dark,
narrow road snakes its way down the foothills of the Himalayas you can’t help
but wonder about how many accidents have occurred or how many cows have been
hit. I was grateful for my deeply reclining seat and quickly allowed myself to
be calmed by the sway of the bus and the cool air.
We arrived at the Dehli metro and bus terminal just after
5am and the dark, hazy city was just waking up and starting its day. By chance
I had been seated by a French woman who has lived into India for the past 25
years and we had spoken briefly during a midnight break. She inquired where I
was headed and helped me get to the metro part of the station. Together we
boarded a yellow line train and headed into the city. I felt like a small child
being prepared to fly unaccompanied to visit family on the other side of the
country. She showed me the route map, reminded me of my stop and explained
where to go once outside. As we approached my stop I gave her one last wave and
offered my thanks before venturing off on my own.
My first task, and last act of duty before flying to Goa,
was to take all of our passports and a pile of paperwork to the Thailand Visa
Application Center so it could be processed while I was gone. The plan was to
pick everything back up on my way back Delhi the following week. The process
was long but relatively smooth and I left to find my hotel feeling confident
that all would be fine. Unfortunately I had neglected to make a copy of my
passport and Indian visa before submitting it and had to frantically call my
co-leaders in hopes that our partner organization would be able to find and
email me the copies they made so I could check into my hotel. If I hadn’t been
confident in our PL team before, their words of support and quick action would
have done the job. I got into my room,
bathed and settled down to read or watch a movie quietly hoping that I would
have smooth sailing from there. But what would an Emily travel story be without
a speed bump or two?
I have determined that the problem is domestic travel
regardless of the country. While living on the east coast I had multiple
flights delayed, connections missed and spent the night in half a dozen
airports. My bags rarely made it back to Wilmington when I did and once,
according to the flight tag, my suitcase went through Kazakhstan. So I
shouldn’t have been surprised when I received an email telling me to call a
given number to rebook my flight to Goa the next morning. According to the
email and the news stories I found, a plane landing in Surat had hit a buffalo
(think water buffalo not bison) and the airport had been closed indefinitely. I
can only assume that the plane I would have used the next morning was to come
to Delhi through Surat and could not be diverted around. With the help of the
amazing concierge at Hotel Star, I was rebooked on a flight the following
afternoon and returned to my room to get some sleep. I knew I could now sleep
in but woke around 7am to an email informing me that my flight, due to leave at
1:05pm, would now depart at 3:00. Par for the course at this point, I
acknowledged the email and went back to sleep.
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Agonda Beach |
From here my luck improved. I arrived in Goa as the sun was
setting, met my prearranged taxi and made the two hour trip out to Agonda
Beach. Goa has strong Portuguese influences as it was a Portuguese province for
nearly 450 years until it was annexed by India in 1961. Even in the dark, as we
wove through rush hour traffic on the narrow roads, I could see that influence
in the architecture of the homes and buildings and the number of Catholic
churches, schools and hospitals. We eventually got through these more populated
areas and entered into the thick, green jungle that seemed the separate the
beaches from the city. I was welcomed at Fusion by Sylvia, one of the owners,
and shown to my new beach hut home. It was a simple, stilted bamboo structure
with a single room containing a full bed and two small bedside tables. Front
and back porches provided more sitting space and the attached, outdoor bathroom
was stone-floored and roomy. I ventured
out for a late dinner and a celebratory beer before turning in for the night. Setting
up and crawling into my mosquito net was reminiscent of the countless nights in
The Dombe where I meticulously tucked in the edges of my net to prevent any
midnight arachnid companions. I slept like a rock and woke around 8 o’clock as
the hut was beginning to get warm. And here starts the routine I settled into
for the next five days: reading or Skyping in bed, breakfast at the Fusion
restaurant, walking the 200m to the beach, finding a more quiet spot to set up my towel or
settling into a lounge chair, getting some sun or going for a swim, reading,
daydreaming, meditating, walking and eventually going back to my hut to clean
up for dinner.
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My hut |
Once I let myself relax and not think about what the
students were doing back in Palampur, I found that blissful state of having no
responsibilities and no obligations. I could not emerge from my hut until 10am
if I didn’t want to or skip lunch to explore huge boulders while the tide was
out. I could spend an hour just floating in the warm, salty Indian Ocean or I
could stay under an umbrella and read for hours at a time. I could have three
mango ice cream bars while walking through town just for the hell of it and
consider it lunch because the idea of sitting down in the stifling heat seemed
outrageous. I could sit peacefully and meditate on a shaded rock listening to
the waves lap against the rocks and crabs scurry across barnacles closed up
tight to prevent dessication. I could go hours without speaking to anyone,
smiling at those who passed acknowledging their presence but not fully
engaging. I was finding a way to untangle the mess of thoughts and emotions in
my head, to release the tension in my shoulders and lower back and to better my
ability to think about absolutely nothing.
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cows on the beach |
The days slipped by slowly and soon it was time to think
about repacking my few belongings and preparing to head back to Delhi. I went
for one last swim Thursday morning, one last chapter read in the sun, said my
goodbyes to new friends and set off for the Goa airport. My return trip was
uneventful, my hotel air conditioned and cozy and my sleep peaceful. I was in a
completely different head space now and my time in Delhi was dramatically more
simple. I remembered the metro route to the Visa Application Center and spent
just 20 minutes there collecting and organizing the passports compared to the
nearly 2 ½ stressful hours I spent on the front end. I relaxed in Delhi’s
Central Park amongst young, Indian couples flirting in the shade, groups of
young men horsing around on the hill and wandering tourists. I walked through a
street market, dodged the Delhi traffic and enjoyed a cold coke on the corner
before going back underground to make my way to the bus station. I found a
corner in the terrace of the terminal to wait the three hours until my bus left
and read and wrote a couple emails. And then , at 7:20pm, I boarded my bus to
return to Palampur. I felt some of those responsibilities and obligations begin
to sneak back into the front of my brain but I simply acknowledged them and let
them go. Before I knew it I would be back at the IDEX house worrying about
seminars, accounting and students’ GI issues but for another 12 hours I could
simply be present for myself and sleep as my bus snaked its ways back up
towards the towering Himalayas.
I'm Alive - Kenny Chesney & Dave Matthews